Some days are better than others, that’s just how life works. But ultimately, the way we feel about ourselves and our life has the biggest impact on how each day turns out. Confidence and happiness create an outcome that exceeds our expectations. But when we are down on ourselves and especially when we think we aren’t good enough, our day and life can quickly take a turn for the worse.
When we get caught up in a downward spiral of negative self talk and simply feel like we are not good enough for anything or anyone – in order words, we are just not good enough, period – we can find ourselves in a dark hole, which can have detrimental effects on our health, career, relationships and happiness.
But rather than looking for evidence that you are nobody and don’t deserve to be loved, successful and happy, look for evidence that you are wonderful and unique and deserve the very best. Of course it can be difficult to silence that inner critic that’s on a roll to tear you apart, but it is detrimental to remember that you are good enough and deserve everything your heart desires.
Here are our TOP 10 things to remember when you think you aren’t good enough.
#1 Life is About Progress, Not Perfection
Nobody is perfect and life is perfectly imperfect. While striving for perfection isn’t always a bad thing because it makes us work harder and reach higher, keep in mind that perfection is a goal that is rather unattainable and you will always be working on perfection, which will make you feel like you are not good enough. Instead of striving for perfection, embrace the process and strive for excellence. Excellence is a far superior goal and it is actually attainable. Create a level of personal excellence and when you attain it, it is hugely rewarding and will remind you that you are good enough.
#2 You Don’t Have to Listen to Your Inner Critic
That inner critic that tells us that we aren’t good enough or that our plan won’t work or that we are too lazy is only going to tear us down. Keep in mind, we don’t have to listen to everything our mind is telling us. Instead, talk back to that inner critic and put it in its place. Simply tell it to stop and tell it that you are good enough, that you are capable of making any plan work and that you work hard to do the best you can. Focus on your strengths rather than your weaknesses and stop listening to your inner critic.
#3 The People You Compare Yourself to Compare Themselves to Others, Too
We all tend to compare ourselves to others, but believe us when we tell you that people who seem to have it all together, don’t necessarily do. You never see the whole picture when you are comparing yourself to another person and you’d be much better off looking at others through a lens of understanding and compassion than jealousy and judgement. Keep in mind, we are all perfectly imperfect humans going through challenges and don’t forget, while you compare yourself to another person, that person is comparing themselves to someone else, too. So stop comparing right now and focus on yourself instead.
#4 What You Do Right Now Can Create a Better Result
Nothing is written in stone, unless of course it’s in the past. But we can even change the past by changing our way of perception. We also can’t truly predict the future, because it is always changing based on what we are doing right now. The best way to create a better result in the future is to be fully present in the now and focus on the present in a positive way. If we can manage to feel good about the things we have right now and develop an attitude of gratitude, more good things will come to us. The same is true when we focus on the negative. So you have a choice, but keep in mind, focusing on the positive is much more powerful and will get you to where you want to go.
#5 Everyone Makes Mistakes
The truth is, we all make mistakes and they aren’t really a problem, but rather an incredible opportunity to teach us something so that we can learn and grow. A mistake is simply an incident that points us into the direction of where we can grow stronger and keep in mind, a mistake is evidence that we are trying. All we can do is to continually learn and grow from our mistakes and we will start to be able to achieve success, fulfillment and true happiness.
#6 There Is More Right With You Than Wrong
Even during our toughest times and struggles, it is essential to focus on our strengths. Our culture too often looks at weaknesses, but it is important to have a balanced mind and body, so whenever we find a weakness, we need to balance that with our greatest strengths. Whenever you feel like you are not good enough shift your focus on what’s right about yourself, because fact is, there is more right with you than wrong. And if you truly believe you need to improve in certain areas, create an action plan to do so and add that new skill to your list of strengths.
#7 There Is Always a Solution
Sometimes it can feel like we’ve reach the end of a road. But that’s never the truth. Keep looking and you will always find another small dirt path that will allow you to keep moving forward. Keep the faith in yourself and know that there is another way that will bring a new solution. It may not always be easy and sometimes you may need to put the pieces together like a puzzle, but the pieces are always there, you just have to look for them and put them in the right place.
#8 What Someone Has Said or Done to You May Not Be About You
Sometimes criticism and verbal attacks can be hard to take and feed right into the feeling of not being good enough. But don’t make the mistake of thinking the criticism is all about you. You never know if the person who is critiquing you is simply having a bad day or week or even month. You never know what life challenges the other person is going through, whether that’s in their personal life or in their career. Don’t let that heavy baggage that they are carrying around be dumped on you. And remember, whatever someone says or does to you is more often than not about them and not at all about you.
#9 You Deserve Your Own Unconditional Love
Holding on to negative thoughts or begrudging yourself is not going to get you anywhere and will only leave you with feelings of resentment and bitterness. Show yourself some compassion and give yourself the unconditional love you deserve. Forgive yourself for making a mistake and allow yourself to love yourself no matter what. It is an incredibly empowering feeling that will lead you to a better understanding, empathy and compassion that will remind you that you are good enough and worthy of love.
#10 Your Mind Plays Tricks on You
Have you ever heard the quote: ‘Don’t believe everything you think.’ The truth is, our mind loves to play tricks on us and when we have negative, discouraging thoughts going through our minds, we don’t have to believe anything we tell ourselves. Keep in mind, thoughts are just thoughts and it can be quite exhausting and unhealthy to give the negative ones so much power. Don’t believe everything you think and focus on the positive much more so than the negative.
It’s so easy to let our own thoughts drag us down, we’ve all been there at one point or another. But it is possible to learn how to handle those moments and turn thing around if you can remember the above things when those feelings come around. The bottom line is that no matter what stories we tell ourselves, we have the power to overcome any challenge we face and overcome the stories we tell ourselves.
IT ALL STARTS AND ENDS WITH YOU – REMEMBER YOU ARE ENOUGH JUST AS YOU ARE
Joschi & Monika
#BoldNaked