‘Could have. Should have. Would have.’ We all have regrets and experience these dark emotions of guilt, shame and regret after a mistake or a bad decision at one point or another in our lives.
Whether we spend too much time in a job we hate, buy stock right before the stock market crashes, hold on to problematic relationships, eat too much sugar or mess up a really important presentation, there are certain situations in life where we would do things differently if we could rewind the time and do it all over again.
The truth is though, no matter what bad decision or mistake we made, there are an endless number of reasons why we should move on and never regret any of our decisions, even if it seems like the biggest mistake of your life.
We are presented with decision after decision after decision and we are bound to make a few bad ones. Life is a big game of trial and error and all we can do is give our best and when things go wrong, all we can do is to move on and get ourselves back on track.
Here are our TOP 10 tips to recover from a bad decision and turn it into something positive.
#1 Don’t Dwell on It
Sometimes it seems impossible to let go of a mistake or bad decision and we keep thinking about it, mulling it over in our head. More often than not, these thoughts will make us feel even worse and this negative cycle will continue, until we make the conscious decision to stop. Realize that dwelling on a mistake will only keep you stuck in a negative downward spiral and doesn’t get you anywhere. Take responsibility, know that you did the right thing in the moment with the knowledge and mindset you had at the time and cut yourself some slack. We are all human and make mistakes. Instead of dwelling on it, analyze the situation and figure out how you can avoid making the same mistake in the future.
#2 Take Responsibility
In order to be able to move on, you have to take responsibility for your part in the situation. It doesn’t do anyone any good to blame others, make excuses or pretend you weren’t involved. Take full responsibility for your choices and actions, accept what happened and move on.
#3 Understand Your Choices
Another essential step in being able to move on is to understand why you made the decision you made. Remember, this is not the time to make excuses for what happened or play the blame game, but rather to figure out why you made the mistake or wrong decision so you can avoid doing the same thing in the future. Really dig deeper in your process, understand your reasoning at the time and find out where you needed more information and knowledge.
#4 Focus on the Present
As we’ve mentioned above, it’s easy to dwell on the bad decision, but we’ve realized that this is just a waste of time that doesn’t move anyone forward. The most productive thing we can do is to shift our focus on this present moment. Pay attention to all the positive things you are currently doing instead of the negative things you’ve done in the past.
#5 See the Opportunity for Growth
Realize that a bad decision doesn’t make you bad. You messed up and it only becomes a big deal when you let it consume your mind and with that eat away at your ego. Remember, you are an amazing individual with great talents and skills. Yes, you’ve made a mistake, but rather than beating yourself up over it, see it as an incredible opportunity for growth. If you wouldn’t have made the bad decision or mistake, you would stay stagnant and never improve yourself. Here’s your chance, move on and work on developing more skills and talents.
#6 Remember that Everything Is Temporary
Keep in mind, all we ever experience is this very moment. Life happens in the present and whenever you dwell on the past or think about the future, you create a subjective illusion. Close your eyes for a few seconds and when you open them again, realize that whatever you experience is temporary. Emotions come and go. Decisions come and go. Things come and go. Nothing ever stays the same, so remember that the mistake you made is temporary as well. Focus on the now and move on.
#7 Master the Art of Self-Forgiveness
Whenever we make a mistake or bad decision, we are actually the person who is the hardest on ourselves. Before you are able to move on, you have to learn to forgive yourself. Remember, we are wonderful, imperfect human beings and not every choice we make is going to be perfect. Learn the art of self-forgiveness and move forward.
#8 Talk it Through
If you find yourself overwhelmed by the powerful emotions of guilt and regret and you don’t find a way to control them, reach out to a trusted friend. Talk it through with someone else and your subconscious mind will start to look for solutions. You may get insights from your friend, but speaking about your problem out loud will clarify what happened and you will find the solution yourself. It’s much easier to move on when you admit to the mistake to someone else and don’t try to hide it.
#9 Cultivate a State of Gratitude
One of the easiest ways to move on is to get yourself into a strong state of gratitude. The amazing things is that even though we have 60,000 to 70,000 thoughts a day, we only have one thought at a time and when we replace a negative thought and state of mind with a thought and feeling of gratitude, we can move on fast and efficiently. Stop dwelling on the past and start to appreciate what you have right now. New doors will open up for you and a huge weight will lift off your shoulders.
#10 Be Proactive in the Future
After making a bad decision or mistake, the best thing you can do is to find ways to be proactive afterwards. Figure out how you can fix or change the situation right now and think about the things you can do in the future so you don’t end up in a similar situation. There is tremendous power in being proactive in the future that will allow you to move on and succeed.
There will be a time in your life when you find yourself in a situation where you made a bad decision. Own your choices and realize that there is always a new choice in this present moment. You can decide to dwell on the past or you can decide to move on, find value in your journey and take charge of your life.
OWN YOUR BAD DECISION, LEARN FROM IT AND MAKE LIFE BETTER IN THE FUTURE
Joschi & Monika
#BoldNaked