One of the greatest, most important adventures of our lives is to discover who we really are, yet so many of us are walking around either not really knowing or listening to that awful inner critic that gives us all the wrong ideas about ourselves.
You need to know who you are. Not because we say so and not because it’s trendy to be self-aware but because knowing who you are is the first step to anything and everything else. Until you understand at the very basic level who you are, you’ll be living your life unconsciously.
Finding yourself may sound like a self-centered goal, but reality is that it is actually an unselfish process, which is the root to everything we do in life. In order to be a valuable person to ourselves and the world around us, to be the best partner, the best parent, the best employee, the best friend… we have to first know who we are, what we value and what we have to offer.
Everybody greatly benefits from this personal journey. It’s a process where we shed all the layers of ourselves that don’t serve us and don’t really reflect who we are and then build ourselves up again and recognize who we want to be, passionately going forward towards fulfilling our unique destiny, whatever that may be.
Here are our TOP 10 tips to help you find yourself.
#1 Accept Yourself
Above all else you have to accept yourself and resolve to make peace with who you are so that you can start showing up to the world. Self-acceptance is the first vital step towards finding ourselves, because it is impossible to fully know ourselves if we don’t recognize the aspects of ourselves that we don’t like. Don’t let your insecurities overwhelm you but instead, let your authentic self shine. Because once you show up as your authentic self and accept who you are – flaws and all – you will draw in every experience, opportunity and person into your life that aligns with your true happiness.
#2 Stop Judging
Besides accepting yourself, you need to learn how to accept everything else in your life as well. Stop judging and drop the expectations of what you want and how you think others are supposed to behave and the order in which things need to happen. Sure, the good stuff is always easy to accept because it makes us happy, but change your attitude towards the bad stuff, too. Instead of judging, find the lessons, because the tough stuff and the people who challenge us are our greatest teachers because they force us to unravel the layers that cover our authentic self.
#3 Go on an Adventure
Whether it’s a day trip, a long weekend in the mountains, a solitary retreat or a week-long adventure in an exotic place, go out and explore the world. Going on an adventure allows you tap into the flow and it will also give you the much needed time and focus to re-connect with yourself away from the noise of your regular life. Exploring new places and experiencing new things and people will open up your mind to the world and when you come back you will have a lot more clarity about where you want to go.
#4 Dream Big
Take a moment and think about the kinds of dreams you had before you got caught up in the busyness of your everyday life. What do you deem impossible because of where you are today? Reconnect with your dreams – or better yet, come up with some new dreams. In a perfect world, what do you love to do, be or have? What is your heart and soul aching for? When you reconnect with your dreams and dream big, you will develop the inspiration and desire to take action towards achieving your dreams and like magic you will find yourself.
#5 Expand Your Comfort Zone
Staying in your comfort zone and doing the same things day in and day out won’t help you to find yourself. You need to get uncomfortable by stepping out of your comfort zone and try new things and meet new people. Keep in mind, growth doesn’t happen if you stay comfortable in your bubble. You need to challenge yourself on a regular basis and do something that is slightly terrifying, yet exhilarating and invigoration. It’s the space where you stretch yourself just enough to continue to evolve and grow. What’s the first thing that comes to your mind? Go out and do that!
#6 Get Quiet
Every single day there are messages, signs and guideposts that will give you clues about who you are and inspire you to act, but you will only be aware of them if you are open. With our noisy, busy lives and all that mind chatter that’s going on it can be difficult to notice the signs that are all around us. The answer is easy. Get quite and listen. Pay close attention to the people you meet, the songs you hear on the radio, the signs you see on the street. There are messages and messengers all around you that help you to move forward. Keep in mind, the key to finding yourself may come as an aha moment in the shower or on a billboard in Times Square. Pay attention, listen and then follow through with your inspired action.
#7 Don’t Fight Your Feelings
Whatever emotions and feelings you are dealing with, don’t try to suppress or deny them. If you want to get to know yourself again and find your true authentic self, you have to feel and experience all your emotions and feelings rather than avoiding them. Keep in mind, in order to understand yourself better and be able to move forward in life, you have to become aware of how you feel because your emotions and feelings in any given moment will give you great insight into your current situation and can serve as a catalyst for change. Learn to listen to your emotions and feelings because your intuition is a great guide, you just have to learn how to tune into it.
#8 Trust Yourself
It is impossible to find yourself if you don’t trust yourself or the process of getting to know yourself. Sure, at some point in life we all can lose touch with ourselves in some way, but in order to find ourselves again, we have to believe in ourselves and believe that we have everything within us in order to thrive again. Don’t turn your back on yourself and remember that the most important relationship you’ll ever have in life is with yourself. You can’t run away from you, so learn how to trust yourself, your inner voice and your intuition and it will become so much easier to find yourself.
#9 Dispel Negative Thinking Patterns
Negative thinking is one of the biggest roadblocks on your journey to finding yourself because that inner critic inside your head tries to sabotage you and tell you that you aren’t good enough, that you can’t accomplish anything and that you won’t ever find your way in life. However, it is important to remember that the inner critic only exists because our ego gets scared. So quite your ego and focus on the positive rather than the negative. Sure, we all know that this is easier said than done, but simply starting your day with a positive affirmation, smiling more or singing in the shower are great ways to inject more positivity into your life.
#10 Read Fiction, Watch Movies, Listen to Podcasts
Reading fiction, watching movies and listening to podcasts can give us great insight into other people’s experiences and minds, which inspires a new perspective into our daily life that can give us great insights into our own self. We get so caught up in our to-do list and go through our day with lightning speed that it becomes difficult to connect with ourselves. But if we can manage to take the time to read, watch and listen to other people’s motivation and inspiration we can find ourselves by connecting to others.
Recognize your personal power and be open and vulnerable to all the experiences that come along the journey of finding yourself. Don’t fear this process and definitely don’t avoid it. Seek it out with compassion and curiosity like you would have towards a fascinating new friend.
TAP INTO YOUR POWER TO CREATE THE LIFE YOU LOVE
Joschi & Monika
#BoldNaked
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